October 5, 2024, 12:47 pm | Read time: 4 minutes

Cats love to be stroked. Unfortunately, there are a few things you can do wrong, and misunderstandings often arise. PETBOOK editor and cat behavior expert Saskia Schneider explains the mistakes you should avoid when petting cats.

First, allow a sniff, then proceed to stroke

Imagine a complete stranger walking up to you, shaking your hand, and patting you on the shoulder without introducing themselves. Most of us would probably stand there completely taken aback and let it happen. But some might react defensively – and cats can have a similar response.

Therefore, if you wish to pet an unfamiliar cat, it’s polite to first introduce yourself by offering your hand for the cat to sniff. If the animal then keeps its distance or stares at you tensely, you should not start stroking it. If, on the other hand, the cat snuggles up to you, you should start by stroking the cat’s back or cheeks slowly.

Incidentally, the introduction ritual doesn’t just apply to unfamiliar cats. Even your own pets appreciate the courtesy of a scent exchange before the cuddling begins. This is especially true for cautious or anxious cats.

Pay attention to signals

Cats sometimes communicate very subtly. A slight twitch of the tip of the tail or the ears is enough to signal: I don’t want to be stroked anymore. Unfortunately, we humans easily overlook such signals or first have to learn to read our animals’ body language correctly.

You should always keep an eye on body language, especially with unfamiliar cats. Some cats react very angrily if you ignore their signals.

Choosing the right moment for petting

Cats look particularly cute when they are cuddled up on a blanket somewhere. The temptation to reach into their soft fur is great. Fortunately, your own cats rarely have a problem with this and are happy to receive attention.

However, exercise caution with cats you don’t know. You should never simply touch them without checking the situation. After all, not all animals want to be stroked by humans or prefer to be left alone at that moment.

However, there are also times when even the most patient cats find petting silly – for example, when eating or grooming. The rule here is: don’t touch!

Stroking cats in the right places

There are places where cats like to be stroked and parts of the body that it is better not to approach with your hands. These include paws and the tail. The belly is also a dangerous area – cats are most vulnerable here, and not all of them allow people to touch them. The places where almost all cats enjoy being stroked are the upper back and the cheek area or the head.

Do not stroke for too long

Petting is soothing for cats – it likely reminds them of being groomed with their mother’s tongue when they were kittens. But it can also have a stimulating effect on the animals. You should therefore be careful not to stroke too vigorously and, above all, not for too long. Otherwise, the cat may become overstimulated and release its “energy” like a balloon bursting – usually by clawing at the person stroking it.

More on the topic

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Behavior explained Cats bite when stroked for these 4 reasons

Lifting, kissing, etc. 17 things cats can’t stand

Avoid stroking too roughly

While dogs love having their fur stroked or being lightly patted on the side, this is too rough for many cats. Many animals also don’t like being stroked against the grain – especially not on the back.

Cats prefer steady, calm movements. Many cats also enjoy a gentle kneading motion. You should approach this slowly and keep a close eye on your cat so that you don’t overshoot the mark.